After you left, my life was like a moonless night. Very dark, but there were stars - points of light and reason. And then you shot across my sky like a meteor. Suddenly everything was on fire; there was brilliancy, there was beauty. When you were gone, when the meteor had fallen over horizon, everything went black. Nothing had changed, but my eyes were blinded by the light. I couldn't see the stars anymore. And there was no more reason for anything.

My Immortal - Evanescence
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designer Dancing Sheep
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It's really very painful these few weeks..
Trying to do everything i can, while she's trying
to do everything to ruin it..
Because of her I've stop contacting most of my
friends.. Because of her I've not even have 10 friends
altogether now.. and she's just simply taking it so easily.

No matter what happens I'm always the last one on
her mind.. Her GOOD and CARING friends will always
be one of the top, and she feels so good about that.
She really think that those ppl are really so caring bout
her.. Let it be.. One day those ppl will disappoint her
like how they disappoint me.

I really need alcohol back in my life.. cuts, all sorts of
stuff that will numb this huge amount of pain she's
inflicting on me unknowingly..
Until now.. i'm still wondering.. Why cant I be like the
real Ah Bao totally, no feeling for love or whatsoever..
Why did God even create love in this world..
Why did He say such great things about love, only to
make me suffer so much by the word love...
WHAT IS HIS MOTIVE FOR PLAYING ME???
WHY!!!!!!!

Labels: gonna breakdown very soon..